Remembering a Family Man

Blogging is difficult at the moment because it involves sitting down and thinking and thinking is one thing I’ve steadfastly been trying to ignore this month.   You see, today is a year to the day that my father-in-law, Ivan Tomlinson, was tragically killed in a motorbike accident while he was on his way, with a colleague, to the bike night on Poole Quay in Dorset.   He was a sensible rider and so it came as a complete shock to us.

Ivan was a brilliant father-in-law and, in the seven years I was with his son while he was alive, I came to think of him as important to me as my own father.   When things were difficult between me and Tobi, Ivan never took sides, despite the fact I know he was very angry with my behaviour at times.    He took the time to tell me that whatever happened he and his wife, Val, wanted to continue to be in my life and spend time with me and their grandchildren.

He was a brilliant grandfather to my children and he was always so pleased and excited to see them, his face lit up whenever he came through the door.

I can’t take away the pain Tobi is feeling today, and I can’t bring his father back.   All we can do is remember him and the happy times we had with him.

Ivan was a carpenter and Tobi inherited his tools when he passed.   He has kindly given me one of his metal rules to use for my sewing- it has his name etched on the back.   I like to think that Ivan would like the fact that his tools are still being used for creative things.

Anyway, that’s enough of being sad.   I do have some happy things to share coming up over the next few days so stay tuned.



8 thoughts on “Remembering a Family Man

  1. I hope you can manage to hold onto all those good memories and not dwell too much on the sadness – my cousin passed away in this February just gone, also in a motorbike accident. He too was a sensible rider and it’s really hit us all hard! I’m just happy to know that the last time I saw him we had a laugh and it was at a time when the family were all together celebrating. We’ll both miss our family members dearly, but they’ll always be there with us in our hearts and minds 🙂 hope you’re ok! x

    • Thanks for your thoughtful comments and I’m sorry for your loss too. It’s just so difficult to accept when it’s completely out of the blue. But he would have rather gone that way, on his bike doing something he loved, than a long drawn out illness. Thanks

  2. Lovely Blog Sewcial! I can second everything you have said from not taking sides to being an amazing grandfather. Thoughts are with you and yours x

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